The dream was always the same: I was standing fully dressed in a steamy showerroom crowded with naked young men listening to a voice in my head urging me to admit I was gay. It was a dream that put me in touch with my greatest longing---to have a gay companion whom I could love fiercely and passionately. But it was also a dream that put me in touch with my greatest fear---losing...
My feelings for my school chum grew. It was Ken I found attractive, never the guys around us. I didn't think it would be a problem if we continued the way we were going, but it was because of what I couldn't tell other people. I feared rejection by friends at school who were important to me. I feared rejection by my church-going mom. At services, I sat praying for God to give me...
My first time was with a school chum on a beat-up old sofa in his garage. It was all crazy, wild, and wonderful, until I ejaculated. Then all I could think of was how fast I could get home. I didn't want to be anywhere near this guy ever again, I was certain. But when I got home, I was sorry I left him. It was the same way the second time we did it. Afterwards, I wanted...
I was twenty-three and happy with my life, I was not involved with anyone, but I really didn't feel the need to be. Last June I was with Megan, but I couldn't stand to be around her for more than a hour anymore; it was like all women we becoming a pain in the ass. I needed someone I could talk to and have fairly good sex life with. I mean how many girls was I with, I...
It was hard to believe my mother was getting remarried. I hated the idea of living out in the country with none of my old friends being around to hang with, and worst of all was the guy she was marrying had a son that was about a year older than me. They both seemed nice enough and I liked Jason, my new stepfather, but I just didn't trust his son Joshua. Mother and I moved...
A Beginning?, Part II My father won his seat in Congress, then went off to Washington alone. Mom was depressed and I was lonely. There were no more meals as a family, no more weekend outings, no holidays together. Mom didn't want to spend time at home waiting for dad to call, so she went looking for a job. All this I tried keeping secret, but it was difficult...
My Redneck Roommate, Part I His name was Toby, and he had come about the ad. I stood in my doorway looking at him and my first thought was, "This is not what I had in mind when I advertised for a roommate." For one thing, he was too young-probably no more than about 20. That would make him a good five years younger than I am. And for another, he was...
My Redneck Roommate, Part II Toby's hand was rough, but his touch was gentle-against my cheeks, my lips, my Adam's apple. I shuddered as he moved lower-to my chest, my nipples, and my armpits. Every nerve ending in my body was alert. I was simultaneously aware of his hand caressing me, his chest against my ribs, the sudden coldness when his belly broke contact with...
Help From An Uncle, Part II There were no secrets or closed doors permitted in Uncle Bill's home. His gay lover explained why: "In college, a good friend of your uncle committed suicide rather than tell his parents that he was gay. It hit your uncle especially hard, because he had to tell his family that he was gay too. Since that time, honesty from...
I had just started the new school and I didn't really know any one there, except for one of my friends named Dave, I really didn't like the new school and wished that I didn't go to that school. I was walking in the hallway, when I saw a guy who was short, but hanging out with a lot of tall guys in the 12th grade. He was hot and not the best in being cool but something...
I went through my teens scared to death that my parents would find out I was gay before I was ready to tell them. College provided me my first chance to move away from them and I jumped at it. But, oh Lord, how fast college life moved! I was told that I would be sharing a room in a dorm with another student. Days later, I was still looking for him. Gay guys were easy to...
A Beginning? My dad was a mayor of a California beach town who loved having his family around him when photographs were taken. At 18, I hated being in those photos because kids at school always made fun of them. They made fun of me. "Well, you'd better get used to it," mom said one day. "Because your dad is running for Congress next year." ...
One summer night me and my friend, Steve Dalen, were outside looking at the stars while laying on my trampoline. We were talking about how we were going to win our basketball game the next day. Somehow that conversation led to us talking about how our teammate T.J. Hall had walked around the locker room that day after practice with nothing on for over 5 minutes This wouldn't...
As the end of my senior year approached, I was filled with mixed emotions. I was ready to move away from the tediousness of high school and head off to college. However, some things were going to be missed. I have had an intense crush on my band teacher since I started high school in the ninth grade. He was very attractive, in his late twenties with a killer set of baby blue...
Let me tell you about my teen years: I wasted them idolizing every good looking guy who enjoyed popularity. I didn't like myself and couldn't imagine anyone else liking me, either. My teacher-counselor called me "the poster boy for low self-esteem." My closest friend called me a "dork." I thought I'd be accepted if I dressed like other guys, spend a little ...
My first submission here is a brief story I wrote a while back while I was Cliffhanger on Compuserve. Hope you like it. Warning: This story contains graphic descriptions of sex between cconsenting males. If this type of story offends you, does not appeal to you, or if you are under the age of 18 (or whatever the legal age in your area is) then simply do not read. Comments are...
Johnny swung his tennis shoe clad foot over the edge of the boat, and found his balance on the uneven, rocky surface of the shore. He was already doubting that this was the best idea Ted had ever had. The rocks were none too sure, and his crutches would have a hard time finding secure support. He reached for the aluminum rods, and slid his fore-arms into the housings. Ted was...
Coming Out For A Friend....Part I Mark and Steve have been best friends ever since they were 10 years old. And now the two of them were in the their early 20's. One day they decided that it would be good to move in together. And at first things were going along just fine, when Steve passed by Mark's bedroom and the door was open Steve had noticed that there were...
Acting was my big dream. I fell in love with the theatre, hung out with actors, even took jobs where I might run into actors. I just wanted to be a part of that whole experience. But all of that changed when I met my first agent. Here was a guy with power. He made things happen for other people, he didn't wait for anything to develop on its own. "So, you want to be...
Robin was a cousin who knew I was gay before I did. He didn't miss my interest in other boys, my interest in him, or my confusion about where to go with my feelings. With our parents around all the time, it wasn't easy to get more than a few minutes of conversation out of him at a time, then there wasn't much he could say that really meant anything. "Be careful, the...
Help From An Uncle The first week of summer vacation brought the whole damn bunch---aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, cousins and grandparents. It was like an invading army. The one relative who didn't show was the person everyone talked about---my uncle Bill. I didn't know there was an uncle Bill. "Yeah, he's the blacksheep of the family,"...
It was one of those hot muggy afternoons you had to spend in your backyard pool or next to an air conditioner. My mom had already claimed the pool for herself and some girlfriends and told me to disappear. That meant they would all be nude at the pool before long. One of those girlfriends brought along her eighteen-year-old grandson and told him to disappear. He came...
A school chum was the only boy I ever propositioned and he turned me down. I felt so foolish, things were never the same between us. Whenever I saw him approach, I looked around for the nearest place I could hide. Then, he was gone, out of my life, moved away. I crawled out from under my rock and graduated with my class. Three years later, I ran into him coming out of a...
"A living hell" is the only way I can describe my late teens. At home were a mom and dad who lived to fight and each day brought them a step closer to killing each other. A job working nights was an escape route I took and exhaustion was an excuse I gave my mom for renting a room at the Y instead of driving home every morning. The real reason for the room, of course,...
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