Gay Erotic Stories

“Shit, yeah, dude. If I’m gonna pass History and graduate this damn school, I’ll need you.”

“For sure?” Despite last night, I was still a little insecure that the quarterback of our high school football team wanted to hang around with a geek runner like me.

Joey put his hand on my thigh and looked into my eyes with the same funny look he’d had after sucking me off last night.

“For sure.”

“Okay. Monday then? After practice? At the flag pole in front of school?

“Monday at the flag pole.”

I smiled and got out. Before I could close the door, he shouted after me.

“Oh! And T.J., stay out of those library bathrooms, you never know who could be in the stall next to you.” He pulled the door shut and sped away from the curb. I stood there looking at the back-side of his car.

“Fuck!” I shouted to the sky. Joey Collucci had been the one in the bathroom when I jerked off that time. Fuck!

Even though I tried to do it as quietly as possible, whoever was there had figured out that I was spanking it and had even applauded and whistled when I was done. I was so freaked out that I ran out of there and raced home. I missed out first tutoring session that afternoon as a result. He had fucking known all along! Fuck!

I spent the rest of the weekend walking around in a daze. My parents asked all sorts of questions about where I’d gone after the game Friday night. I told them the truth that I had hooked up with a friend on the team and wound up staying the night. They were pretty mad I hadn’t called but they would eventually get over it. Other than my bike that I used to ride back and forth to school, it wasn’t like they could ground me or take anything away that was of any value. If they took away my bike, one of them would have to drive me to school, so I knew that would never happen.

I called Will and apologized for not helping to put away the equipment after the game. My best friend had volunteered us to help move the chains along the sidelines of the football games. Will and I moved the yardage markers that were connected by a ten-yard long chain and our new friend Andy took the first down marker. We had to wear these ridiculous orange jumpsuits, presumably to stand out from the football players, and boy did we.

“So what happened to you T.J.?” Will asked me. “Did you wind up getting together with Joey or something?”

I considered not telling him, but I figured what the hell. Will was a great guy and didn’t have a jealous bone in his body.

“Um, yeah. We just went over to his house to…”

“To what? Get high or something?”

“No. We didn’t get high.” I was still searching for some reasonable excuse for me and the starting varsity quarterback to be hanging out late at night at his house. “You know, I’ve been helping him with History. I helped him write a paper last week.” “Yeah right! I can’t frigging believe I;. my best friend, smoking a joint with the QB. Way to go dude!”

“It wasn’t like that, we really…”

“Hey, speaking of getting loaded,” Will interrupted. “Andy said he scored some killer weed and wants to know if you and I want to come over to his house this weekend. Apparently his folks are going on a cruise or something.”

I was relieved for the change of subject.

“Um, yeah, sure, why not? What day?”

“Why? I mean, I know what you’re doing Friday night. The three of us will be orange Popsicle sticks on the sideline of the game over at Wilson High. I guess he wants to do it Saturday night.”

“Okay, sounds good. Saturday night it is,” I said.

“Cool.”

“What if I get a date?” I asked, knowing the likelihood of this was lower than our chances of actually beating Wilson, last year’s state champs.

Will laughed. “If you get a date, bring her along. I think he’s got plenty. T.J., you’re like 18 frigging years old and you’ve been on what, all of 3 dates in your life? Get real, dude!”

“Thank you. But you never know, lightning could strike.”

The telephone conversation with Andy did not go so smoothly. Andy and I had only been friends for the past couple weeks since Will had asked him to join us moving the yardage chains. My introduction to him was a little weird. He came into Will’s bedroom one Saturday morning while I sat there with a hard-on under the covers thinking of my best friend in the shower. Andy pegged me right away and even grabbed my dick through the blankets. Andy was from New York, so I guess that’s where he got his ballsiness.

After that initial meeting, he and I had been in my bedroom when he decided he wanted to measure my dick. For some stupid reason, I’d mentioned that when it was fully hard it measured eight and a third inches and Andy wanted proof. He got his proof. Laying on the floor of my bedroom later that same afternoon, I thought that for sure my years of virgin-hood were finally going to come to an end with my new pal Andy. Unfortunately, he just wanted to torture me. After we confirmed the length of my dick and I could tell he had a boner through his cords, he insisted we go for a run together. So we did, and I never got to see his dick. I knew he has size 11 feet though and he seemed to brag about that, so I held out hope that I might be able to test out the big feet rule on my new 18-year old friend from New York. But all we did that day was run. And I went home and had to jerk off fantasizing about it--twice.

Andy picked up on the first ring; “I was wondering when you’d get around to calling me, you whore. Tell me everything.”

“Andy, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about! What did you do with our precious quarterback? Did you insist he measure your cock?”

“Andy!”

“Did you let him try on your sweet orange jumper?”

“Andy, I told you,” I tried to explain. “I tutor Joey in History. I helped him with a term paper.”

“Uh huh. Pull this leg and it plays jingle bells. Is it true what they say that it’s big and fat like a baseball bat?”

“A baseball bat!” I paused. How could he possibly?

“Ooh, caught you dude. You saw Joey’s dick! You saw Joey’s dick!” Andy sang.

“Bro, I’m telling you…”

“And bro, I’m telling you. I saw the way that Joey Collucci looked at you on the sideline at halftime.”

“What are you talking about? He had just been like totally wiped out on the field and was unconscious like ten minutes before that.”

“T.J. I’m telling you what I saw with my own eyes. Joey Collucci has a hard-on for you.”

“Andy, he’s the quarterback of our football team, you can’t say shit like that,” I protested.

“And I’m just a New Yorker with a sixth sense about these things. Okay. Deny it all you want. You saw Joey’s dick. You saw Joey’s dick,” he sang again.

There was silence on the line for a moment.

“And what if I did?”

Andy whistled. “Holy shit--I knew it!”

“Maybe I gave him a massage.”

“Okay, now we’re getting somewhere. Go on, go on.”

“That’s it. That’s all that happened,” I insisted, hoping this would satisfy him. I knew it wouldn’t.

“All right,” Andy said. “I’m gonna let you off easy this time. But you know you owe me a story.”

“Why do I owe you a story?”

“Because you do; that’s all. You know, T.J., I think I really like it out here. You boys are nothing like New Yorkers. This place is awesome.”

“I’m glad you like it. That’s a good thing; you do sort of live here now.”

“So did Will tell you I’ve got some primo grass for the 3 of us to get high on this weekend?”

I hesitated. “Yeah, he mentioned it.”

“Good, so you’re in. My folks are going to Florida for this cruise, so we’ll do an early movie then come back to my house and get really fucked up. Deal?”

“Deal. Do you have food? Will gets like totally starving whenever we smoke pot.”

“I’m sure we’ll have some munchies, Mr. Eight and One Third.”

“Jesus Andy, you’re not gonna tell anybody are you?”

“T.J.! Like I would tell somebody you let me measure your boner with a ruler? That you insisted I measure your boner with a ruler, I should say,” he laughed. “What do you think? I’ve got a death wish?!”

“Good, just keep it to yourself.”

“Sure, buddy, sure. By the way, I have something in mind for you and Will once we’re high anyway this weekend.”

“What do you have in mind?” I asked.

“You’ll see. Just bring your skinny little butt and your hunky best friend over to my place on Saturday. I’ll have everything all set.”

I hung up the phone and took a deep breath.

I sat down. There were too many crazy things going on in my life. First Andy. And then Joey. Then Andy again. What the fuck?

Fortunately, the week at school was kind’ve back to normal. Will and I hung out at lunch like usual. All the girls, and even a few guys, would come up to Will and start up a conversation.

Most of them were so idiotic but Will was as nice to everyone as he could possibly be. We were both sort of looking forward to going over to Andy’s house to smoke some weed on Saturday so we kept our schedules open; pretty hard for Will, not a challenge at all for me.

Even Joey and I had a relatively easy time being together. We really worked on History. Neither of us even mentioned my spending the night at his house after the game last Friday night. And neither of us certainly brought up the fact that he had sucked me dry before falling asleep with our bodies locked together. Toward the end of the week, I began to think it had been a flash in the pan.

At the game Friday night, as expected, we got trounced. We were no match for Wilson. Everything Joey and our offense tried to do, they had an answer for. Every time the other team went after Joey in the pocket, I held my breath. He got sacked a few times but fortunately no major damage done; nothing like last week when he was knocked out cold. We ended up losing 48-7.

After the game I tried to catch up with Joey to see if he needed a massage or maybe some late night study help, but he was surrounded by like a ton of cheerleaders and all his teammates. So I helped Will and Andy load up the equipment and take it back to school so we could put it away in the gym. After that, Andy gave me a lift home.

Had I just imagined everything that happened at Joey’s house last Friday night? That didn’t seem possible. But Joey hadn’t looked at me with that funny look at any of our History sessions all week. What did that look mean anyway?

Early Saturday afternoon, before I had to be over at Andy’s, I went for a run. When I got home, my mom told me that Joey Somebody called while I was out. I turned bright red.

“Mom, it’s Joey Collucci. He’s like the starting quarterback on our football team at school. Duh!”

She gave me a look of bewilderment. “When did he call?” I asked.

“Well, duh! Stupid me! Maybe half an hour ago,” my mom lowered her voice to imitate me.

“Mom! What did he say?”

“Mom! She echoed, singing it out the way I did. “Just call him back. Here’s the number.” She handed me a piece of paper.

I raced upstairs to my room, three steps at a time and closed my door. Having a phone in my room was a new thing once I had turned 18. My parents couldn’t afford to get me a car, so I settled for a phone; a blue phone.

“Hello.”

“Hey Joey, it’s me, T.J.”

“Hey T.J., how’s it going?”

“Great. Sorry I was out. I went for a run.”

“No problem, I just thought I’d check in. I missed you after the game last night,” Joey said.

“Um. You did? I mean…yeah. What did you and the guys wind up doing?” I asked.

“Just went to a party at some cheerleader’s house. It was pretty boring.”

“Oh really?”

“What did you do?”

I wondered if I should tell him the truth.

“Um, not much. We had to take the yard marker stuff back to school. Then Andy drove me home.”

“Yeah.”

“Then I whacked off like four times before breakfast,” I told him. Joey laughed.

“Really, me too.”

“Those guys at Wilson were pretty tough on you last night,” I said, changing the subject.

There was a pause. “Well, even though it was a good ass-kicking, we stuck to our game plan.”

“Yeah.”

“Except that our game plan didn’t have us losing by like 40 points.”

“No, probably not; so what are you doing the rest of the weekend? Do you want to study?”

“Study?” he laughed. “Not exactly, I was hoping we could, you know…”

“Really?” I asked, wondering where this was coming from since he’d been pretty normal with me all week while we went over History assignments.

“No, I really had a blast with you over at my house last weekend. It would be great to do it again. You know…”

“Really? I thought that maybe…”

“You thought what? That was just a one time thing? Dude, no way.”

“All right, well good.”

“I mean, I never actually came. Plus, you still have no idea why I chose number 11 for my jersey number.”

“I think I have a pretty good idea. My jaw is still sore.” Joey laughed.

“Well, that’s not it,” he said. “When do you have some time?”

“Um, like whenever. It’s not like I have all these dates or anything,” I said.

“I find that hard to believe. You’re a catch.”

“I’m a catch? No fucking way. I’m talking to the quarterback of our varsity team. And he’s telling me that his nerdy friend who’s smart in History is a catch.”

“You are. You should know that.”

I blushed again. “Well, thank you. You’re not so bad yourself--for an 18-year old stud that is.”

“Great, so when are you free?” Joey asked again. I thought about my evening getting high with Andy and Will.

“What about tonight? I’m supposed to go over to smoke some dope with my buddies. Would you like to come too?”

“No, I think I’ll pass. Smoking pot just makes me horny.”

“Isn’t that the idea?”

“Besides, I just thought it would be the two of us.”

“Really? I mean, okay, that sounds good. The thing is I don’t think I can cancel on my friends tonight. We’ve all been really looking forward to it. What about tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow’s fine. Let’s say 3:00 at my house.”

“3:00 it is. What do you want to work on?” I was still sure he’d want to study some History first, or maybe some Math.

“You?”

“Um. Well that’s good,” I stammered. “I mean, okay, that sounds fun.”

“See you then, T.J.” I started to hang up. “Oh, and T.J., wear your orange jumper.”

“You’re kidding right?”

“Nope, wear it. I’ll be in my uniform.”

My dick got hard just thinking about it.

Will, Andy, and I saw some lame action flick Saturday afternoon. My mom dropped me off at Will’s and then he took his dad’s car over to pick up Andy.

Back at Andy’s house, there were boxes everywhere. They had only moved in a couple months ago and hadn’t finished unpacking yet. We ordered out pizza and sat outside in the backyard slamming two large pies.

After dinner, Andy went into the house to get his pot. Me and Will kicked back on the lawn and looked at the sky. Will and I had been great friends since our sophomore year. While he was easily the most popular guy in school, I was his sidekick. While everybody knew Will a little bit, I was really the only one he opened up to. He had a lot of friends, but nobody had the kind of relationship I had with him.

Still despite our closeness, I hadn’t been able to be honest with Will about what was going on with me sexually. I had this total fascination with other guys. In fact, I was pretty taken with Will himself, but somehow it just wasn’t something I could discuss with him. And of course, I hadn’t even seen Will totally naked. Except for a few shots of his butt as he dashed out of bed and into the shower, it was all just left to my fantasies.

I wanted to tell Will the truth about Joey. That’s what best friends are for, after all. I thought maybe it might be a little much for him to handle however. The fact that the fucking starting quarterback had sucked every drop of come out of my dick last Friday night after the game was pretty big fucking news to me. But I just couldn’t find a way to tell him. So I didn’t.

Instead, I just sat there quietly enjoying the stars and Will’s company.

Will was pretty smart and pretty aware of my emotions, so he had probably already figured out that something was going on with me, but he was also too good a friend to confront me. He let it rest, probably confident that I would tell him whatever it was whenever I did.

Andy came out with a shoebox. Size 11, I noticed. “Well gents, I think it’s time to party,” he said.

“Let’s do it,” Will said, sitting up on his elbows.

Andy packed a bong he pulled outside of the box with some brown leafy weed. He filled up the bigger chamber with some cold water from the tap and then plopped himself down on the floor between me and Will.

“Boys, here’s to killing off a few brain cells,” Andy said. He lit the silver cup filled with pot, exhaled loudly and placed his mouth to make a seal on the wide opening of the chamber. Will and I looked on and laughed as Andy sucked the smoke into his lungs. Andy pulled his face away and held his breath, his face turning redder as a few wisps of smoke escaped from between his lips. “Smooth!” he declared as he coughed and exhaled again.

“Mmm, smells great,” Will said. “My turn.”

The three of us took turns taking hits from Andy’s bong. At some point, Andy got up and brought back a brown bottle of something. He poured the liquid into three paper cups and told us to drink.

“What is it?” I asked, taking a sniff.

“I don’t know,” Andy answered. “Cognac or Drambuie or some kind of liqueur.” He busted up laughing and doubled over on the floor. In a moment, both Will and I started laughing. Not knowing what we were drinking was somehow very funny.

After sipping carefully from my cup and smoking a few more loads, I was truly both stoned and drunk. Over the course of an hour, we giggled hysterically over the color of our stupid football yardage outfits, the very short skirts worn by our cheerleaders (some of whom should not be wearing them) and the 0-2 record of our football team (sad really, but funny just the same).

“I think I’m high,” Will said. His eyes were bright red and his voice came out about three octaves lower than his usual one. We laughed uproariously.

“Me too, I think I’ve lost some brain cells,” I whispered before falling onto the floor and banging my head on the coffee table. The boys found this incredibly funny, despite my pain. Andy saved us from dying of laughter with a large bag of chips from the kitchen and a half-gallon of ice cream that we shared.

When we finished the ice cream, Will asked, “What flavor was that?”

“I have no idea.” We were so far gone that we’d finished off a tub of ice cream and not paid any attention to what we were eating. And this was the funniest part of the evening.

Andy flipped on the television and Will and I suddenly became extremely interested in some wildlife show about sheep. When they started to shear the sheep, as if on cue, Andy got up and walked out of the room; when he returned, he was carrying a black case. He put it on the table and sat down.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Gents,” Andy started to explain, “as the football yardage marker carriers of our beloved high school, we owe it to ourselves to show some team spirit.”

“Um, okay, how are we gonna do that?” I asked, intrigued.

Andy opened the case and held up an electric buzz shaver. “We’re going to shave all the hair off our balls. As a team!”

Will was so high he could say nothing but just sit there. I smiled, knowing exactly what Andy was really up to. He plugged it into the wall and extended the cord. The little black and silver shaver hummed. This made Will laugh again, and soon we all joined in.

“Who’s first?” Andy asked when we calmed down. Nobody raised their hand.

“Why are we doing this again?” I asked.

“That sounds like a volunteer to me. I guess T.J. is first!” Andy answered.

“Whoa, wait a minute. Why me?”

“Why not?

I had no answer for this. At Andy’s direction, I slowly took off my shoes and then my jeans.

Standing there in my underwear, I stood up and picked up the shaver that still buzzed in Andy’s hand. “You’re sure about this?”

“Absolutely! I already did it earlier today.”

Andy stood up from the floor and slipped quickly out of both his sweats and his boxers. Before I knew what was happening, he grabbed his own dick with one hand to get it out of the way and tugged down on his ball sack with the other. “See?”

I finally did. I felt Mr. Happy grow a little at the site of Andy’s nuts. They were totally shaved.

“Clean and soft like a baby’s bottom.”

“Um, I’ll take your word for it,” I said, glancing over at Will. He continued to lay quietly on the couch. He was watching with a big smile on his face, but had still said nothing about Andy’s plans for our little team.

“Okay, then,” Andy said. “Get to it. I want yours clean just like this.”

Facing away from Andy and Will, I caught a glimpse of Andy pulling his shorts and pants back on. Damn! I still hadn’t seen Andy’s dick!

Very tentatively, I pulled out my cock and balls and looked at them with caution and curiosity, the buzz shaver still vibrating in my hand. It took a few minutes, but with quite a few encouraging comments from Andy, it was done.

I turned the shaver off and handed it back to Andy and then went into the bathroom to wash off the little hairs. Inspecting myself in the bathroom mirror, I rubbed my palm across my newly soft scrotum and smiled to myself. I had to admit that I liked the feel. Taking a moment to rub both of testes again, I accidentally gave myself a semi-hard boner. The times before when I’d tried to shave myself with a razor hadn’t been near as satisfying as this. Plus there was no blood. Cool!

I snapped my underwear shut, walked back outside to Andy and Will and then imitated Andy by dropping my shorts, whipping my dick to the side with one hand and then pulling my nuts down to show off their smoothness.

“Like a baby’s bottom!” I announced.

“Awesome,” Andy shouted.

We both looked over at Will. He was still a total wastoid.

“Will?” I asked. “Are you ready? It’s your turn to shave.”

“Will?” Andy repeated.

Andy and I looked at each other. “Should we help him?” Andy asked.

“I don’t know. Maybe we should take him to the hospital,” I said.

“Guys, guys, I’m fine. No hospital. I just needed a moment to take all of this in,” Will finally spoke. His words came out very slowly and with perfect pronunciation.

“Will! You can talk!” I said, with sincere happiness that my best friend was not going to be a total zombie for the rest of his life.

“Yes. But I’m not shaving my balls.”

“Will!” I protested.

“Will, it’s for the team,” Andy explained.

“Guys, it’s not that I don’t want to help out here with some team spirit. I just don’t think I can do this. I’m pretty wasted, so I don’t think I should be putting anything sharp near the family jewels.”

“Will, you can’t possibly cut yourself,” Andy explained. “It’s an electric shaver.”

“Uh unh. Not in the shape I’m in,” Will said, “I’ll do it tomorrow after I wake up.”

“Negative Will. It has to be tonight.” Andy stared straight at Will with just a slight upturned grin on his face.

Will looked up at the ceiling, thinking it over. “Then tonight it is,” he said. “You do it. You seem to have the experience anyway.”

I gulped. I pulled on my jeans and missed twice trying to button them up.

“You’re on buddy boy. Drop ‘em.” In less than two seconds, Will was naked from the waist down, his jeans and white briefs gathered around his ankles.

I stood frozen in place, not believing what I was seeing. Will’s penis was enormous. It hung down long and thick on what looked like a small grapefruit-sized ball sack.

“Shit Will,” Andy said, “you’re really hung.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Will said sheepishly. “I don’t get many complaints.”

"Except maybe from girls who don't have double-jointed jaws," Andy laughed.

I was still unable to move but Will didn’t seem to have noticed. He kept his eyes on Andy, who approached him with the shaver already buzzing. Will kept his arms to his sides as Andy got down on his knees to inspect his project. If I hadn’t come in my underwear by now, I was going to do so, most definitely, any second.

Andy casually moved Will’s huge cock to the side and cupped his scrotum with the other hand.

“Pretty fuzzy, dude. You’ve never done this before, have you.”

“Nope, I’m a virgin down there,” Will chuckled. Andy laughed and I would have laughed too had I been able to catch my breath.

“This might take a few extra minutes; I’ve never seen pubes like this?”

“How about those nuts?” I asked, stupidly, still gawking at Will’s horse scrotum. “Ever seen any like that before?”

Both Will and Andy looked over at me like I was crazy, wondering what on earth I was talking about.

“I mean, with all that hair.and all…” I said weakly.

But Andy was into his task and was shaving Will’s grapefruit scrotum like a Marine’s head. I finally sat down and picked up the empty ice cream carton. I stuck the spoon in and came out with nothing, but neither of them seemed to notice.

“This really isn’t so bad,” Will remarked as Andy was finishing up.

“Just got a little more to go, right over here,” Andy said. As he worked on Will’s balls, Andy gripped Will’s dick with his other hand to move it higher and out of the way. He let his hand linger on the shaft. I couldn’t help but notice that Andy’s hand looked tiny next to Will’s cock. Had he tried, it would not gone all the way around. And Will was still soft!

I think.

“Okay, hold still, this will probably tickle,” Andy said. As he shaved away near the base of Will’s dick, Andy held the shaft straight up and tried to pull it taut.

Just as I’d thought, Andy couldn’t get his hand around the bottom of it. The top half of Will’s penis flopped out of Andy’s fist like a wilted flower--a really big, really thick wilted flower. There was a dark red circle near the end and then a knobby head that was like a little plum. As Andy continued to shave away at the base of this massive piece of meat, I watched and spooned myself another bit of air from the ice cream carton.

“All right, hold on, I think you’re getting down to the bone here,” Will said.

“Bone is right,” Andy replied. “It looks like you’re starting to sport some wood, dude.”

“Well yeah,” said Will, looking down. “I mean, you’re pulling on it like it was a piece of chicken or something.” I watched carefully as Will was indeed getting an erection.

“Okay, almost done,” Andy said. “Hold still!” Will’s dick had unbelievably thickened and gotten longer. My mouth suddenly felt like the desert, and I licked the empty spoon.

Andy held Will’s growing wiener down with his forearm while his free hand held the shaver against the last few hairs on Will’s balls. Surely Will would faint outright from the loss of blood to his brain. I looked down at my jeans.

My own hard-on had popped one of the metal buttons and I could see the wetness of my come on my underwear. I lounged back on the couch, hoping nobody would notice, but caught Andy’s eye checking me out while he continued to buzz away at Will.

“If this isn’t some serious male bonding, then I don’t know what is,” Will said, embarrassed not that we both had seem him with a full boner.

“Yep,” I said.

“Okay, I think that’s it,” Andy said. “Will, your dick is scary big!”

“Yep,” I said.

“Sometimes it wears me out when I whack off,” Will said, casually.

“I would think,” Andy responded, just as casually.

“Yep,” I said again.

“Pull ‘em up if you want, Will,” Andy said, referring to Will’s jeans.

“Not gonna happen, boys. I’m totally hard now and I won’t be able to get my jeans over it.”

I almost said, ‘yep’ again but was able to stop myself.

“Well Will, go in the bathroom and jack off or something. I’ve got some lotion you’ll want to rub on your ball sack anyway,”

“I think I’ll just do that,” Will said, as if Andy had suggested that he wipe his nose.

Will struggled to pull his pants up, but he was right. His huge cock was not going to be tucked into them. As he stood up, it flopped down a little but still looked more like a baby’s arm than a penis. Andy smiled as he noticed the ridiculous slab of man-meat dangling upward from Will's mid-section. I sighed.

After Will was in the bathroom, I thanked Andy and excused myself. I decided that I was going to walk home. I had no idea where the rest of the night was going, but I had had about my fill. Andy grabbed my ass as I headed out the door.

“Please apologize to Will for me,” I said to Andy as I scurried away, my own erection not yet gone, but safely protected behind my fists.

Andy smiled from ear to ear with his perfect teeth.

“Have a great night, dude,” I said. “And thanks again. That was amazing.”

“I thought you’d like it, you pervert,” Andy said. I closed the door behind me and took my first decent lungful of air in hours.